A Brand New Pair Of Legs.

    While i was at Wiggins Heights before i had been transferred to Elmwood Heaven,Rodney Henson of Henson Orthotic and Prosthetic Enterprises had come and visited with me. The prosthetics i had been walking on were over 17 years old, and he was going to build me some new ones,eg,stylishplus. i told him before he made casts of my stumps, i would fìrst have to gain back some weight. He left me his card and said he would be back later. i had assumed that when Mr. Henson went back to check on me at Wiggins Heights ，they would tell him where i had been transferred to. On a while i called him up one day while i was at Elmwood Heaven. Mr. Henson was surprised to hear from me. Wiggins Heights had told him that i disappeared and they didn't know where i had gone. He came and made casts for the new prosthetics. i told him i was still a bit underweight but he said he could compensate for that and said he'd be back.
    when Mr. Henson told me that Wiggins Heights told him i had disappeared it
made another thought cross my mind. When 1 left U.C.S.F Marlena, Dr. Parsa's nurse had told me that Julie, Dr. Parsa's coordinator would get in touch with me to schedule a follow up appointment with Dr. Parsa. So i called Julie and discovered that when she had called Wiggins Heights, she was told the same thing that had been told to Mr.Henson, i had disappeared and they had no clue where i had gone. Now something didn't make sense at a1l. How could Wiggins Heights not know where i had been sent when Dr. Dah, whose medical supervision i had been placed under when i left U.C.S.F， was the medical director of both Wiggins Heights and Elmwood Heaven. There was no way to prove it, but i developed the suspicion that Dr. Dah was attempting to punish me because Nurse Ratchett had told him that i was, in his words, rude and demanding. i am thankful to GOD that i didn't need to deal directly witll Dr. Dah for the remainder of my stay at Elmwood Heaven. Julie scheduled me for a follow up MRI and visit with Dr. Parsa to be done in April of 2009.

Speaking the Truth

    It is time to "speak the truth to the people. " 16 It is tinle for the history of the darker peoples of the Catholic church to be set forth so that all can learn,not only of the dark days of colonization and enslavelnent, but also of the days of civilizatiol1s ancient and renowned throughout the world. Instead of
others' stories, we must learn of and share our stories so that we see ourselves
as a new people empowered by our knowledge to take our rightful place in
the ranks of peoples of the world. Pope PauI VI noted when in Africa that
we, as Africans and people of African descent, "are now missionaries to"
ourselves, stating further that "You must now give your gifts of Blackness to
the whole Church," 17 a sentiment reaffi.rmed by John Paul II in his meeting
with black Catholics in 1987.
    We must learn of ourselves and then share that knowledge with others.
"We have come this far by faith," in the words of our gospel heritage, and we
wiU and lnust continue to explore and uncover the truth of our past so that
we may move forward into the future.
    African American Catholìcs have retained, despite the strai11s of slavery,
segregation, discrüni11ation, womens sandals and second-class citizenship, a steadfast faith in
God. Remaining unseduced by the distortions of Christianity force-fed them
during slaver they have always believed in a God who saved, one who was 011
the side of the poor and oppressed, like them.
    As the church fìnally opens itself to the contributions of peoples of every
race and ethnicity, it must also expand its understanding and expression of
God and  esus Christ . This correlates with our understanding of the incarnation
of  esus Christ . If God became incarnate in a hUlnan being a male,
a jew taking on all the charact eristics and appearances of that humanity,
so lnust the church, expressive of Christ's body, incarnate itself today in the
peoples and cultures with whon1 it has COlne in contact. This is not optional;
it is mandated .
    There is "plenty good room" in God 's kingdOln. We must only choose
our seats and sit down. As African An1erican Catholics, however, we must
ensure not only that we are doing the choosing, but that the seats actually fit
us because we have parti cipat ed fully in their construction and placement at
the center, not the periphery, of our church.
    As black Catholics, we are full members of the Catholic cOlnmuniol1.
We have struggled for a long time, but the journey is nearing its end. As we
continue toward that end, we take as our mandate the words of the prophet
Isaiah: "They who wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength, they shaIl
mount up with wings like eagles, they shall run and not be wear只th ey shall
walk and not faint" (Isa 40:31). Our faith has not faltered and our spirit has
been renewed.

MOLLY

    LI1TLE Kyle "Wyarratt leaned against the kitchen table as he ate a hot
oatmeal cookie. His mother could tell he had something on his mind
he wanted to discuss with her. He is an energetic boy and always up
to something. The fact he had been crippled by polio did not slow
him down. His dad had made him a pair of crutches to assist him
to venture around the farm. Kyle had just had his eighth birthday,
when polio had found him and left him with a crippled left leg. As his
mother looked into his sparkling blue eyes, he asked her.
    "Can 1 have a Shetland pony? 1 could ride it to school next month
when school starts. Dad said 1 can't walk that far and he would have to
take me to school everyday. 1 would take good care of it."
    She gave him another oatmeal cookie and then said.
    "Go talk to your father."
    Kyle took but just a second to eat the w缸m oatmeal cookie and
then hobbled outside with his crutches. He had heard his dad working
in the barn earlier so that is where he went first. lt was just about time
to milk the cows an户阳严He helped his dad with the chore of milking
and had since he was six years old. 卫le cow he milked was a small cow
and went by the name of Abby. Kyle would feed her extra hay when his
dad wasn't looking. Abby was his friend and would follow him when
he walked in the pasture. Kyle opened the barn door and found his dad
putting grain in the manger along with some hay for the cows to eat
when they were in the barn to be milked.
    Kyle hobbled over to a bale of hay and sat down. As he sat there
watching his dad put feed in the manger, he felt a cold nose push under
his hand. It was Fetch, the dog, trying to get some attention. He had
followed Kyle to the barn. Kyle knew the reason his dad called the dog
Fetch was because when Fetch was a puppy he would fetch anything
his dad threw and told him to fetch. He even goes into the pasture
and fetches 出e cows when his dad tells him to. When his dad finished
putting the feed in the manger, he came over and sat on the bale ofhay
with his son. As he put his arm around him he asked.
    "What brings you out here? lt is too early to get the cows in the
barn to milk."
    Kyle leaned against his dad and replied.
    "I asked mom if i could have a Shedand pony to ride to school
when school starts again since i can't walk to school. It is about two
miles and you wouldn't have to take me to school everyday. She told
me to ask you."
    His dad gave him a gentle hug as he replied.
    "Son, 1 would love to get you a pony but the very truth is a pony
cost a lot of money and we don't have any extra money for a pony. 1
know you don't understand but someday you will."
    When Kyle was milking Abby later that afternoon， he kept up a
steady conversation with her. He told Abby.
    "You know if you were a pony 1 could ride you to school. 1 like it
when Dad puts me on your back and you give me a ride around the
barnyard. 1 don't think you would like the long walk to school. My
friends would like to see you. You know my friend Elsie has a pony but
she can't ride it anymore. She is sick with polio and is in a cast from the
waist down. 1 feel so sorry for her. She let me ride on her pony when
she was well. My friend Bobby has polio and is in an iron lung. You
know Abby二1 am lucky, 1 may be crippled but 1 can still go outside;
Elsie and Bobby can't. Dad has given me a ride on Smokey and Sandy
but they are big horses and 1 couldn't ride them to school. They are too
big and 1 couldn't get up on their back by myself anyway; besides Dad
needs them to help him work in the fìelds."
    Kyle's dad listened as his son kept up a steady chatter to the cow he
was milking. He knew Kyle was having a hard time milking Abby but
he sure had spunk and wanted to help his dad. He wished there was a
way he could get Kyle a pon予It would take a miracle for him to fìnd
enough money to buy a pony when they were now just barely getting
by on the sparse money they were so fortunate to have. He knew a
pony would give him more time to do the farm work and going to
school in the morning and a丘ernoon would s田e take a chunk out of
his wo rk time.
    Before Kyle crawled into his bed that night, he folded his hands
and knelt as best as his crippled leg would let him. He bowed his head
and said.
    "I sure would like to have a Shetland pony to ride to school. It
would help my Dad and 1 would take good care of it. 1 don't care what
color it is or if it is a boy or girl pony. 1 woul也1't even need a saddle
and it would be my friend just like Abby and Fetch. 1 wouldn't need a
pony if my leg wasn't crippled but the doctor don't know if i will ever
be able to walk without the crutches my dad made for me. Would you
help my mom and dad? Sometimes i see my mom cry because i am
crippled and she can't help me like she wants to. Thank you for Fetch;
he helps me a lot and lets me lean on him and helps me walk without
one of my crutches. Amen."
    After Kyle had said his prayers and was tucked in bed for the night,
his parents sat on the front porch and listened to the night sounds.
It was always a peaceful time of day for them. They quietly discussed
Kyle's wish for a pony but both agreed it would be impossible to buy
him one. 1hey would be lucky to have enough money to get through
the winter and have enough left to buy seeds for spring planting. 1hey
discussed how polio had struck Kyle and two of his classmates during
the last school year. They agreed they were lucky he had a milder case of
polio. His little friend Elsie is in a cast and may never walk again. Elsie
and her parents live just down the road a half mile toward the school.
1hey are such nice neighbors. The sound of the porch swing fit right
in with the sounds of night as they gently swung with his brawny arm
around her as she lay with her head against his chest. It was so quiet she
could hear his heart beat above the chirp of the crickets. She looked up
and said to her husband.
    "Jim everything has a special way of working out."
    She then reached up and gave him a litde kiss.
    Kyle awoke the next morning to the sound of his mother in the
kitchen and his dad carrying the milk pails to the barn as they clanged
together. Just as he was getting out of the warm bed, his mother gently
called for him to get up; it was time for him to help his dad milk the
cows before breakfast. Kyle crawled into his overall and put on a shirt.
His dad always milked the cows while his mom prepared breakfast. He
had told Kyle.
    "Breakfast taste better if you have done a little work first."
    Breakfast always tasted good to Kyle after he had milked Abby;
yes, his dad was right. Sometimes they could smell the bacon frying
when they were coming toward the house with full milk buckets.
Kyle hobbled out to the barn with his crutches and received a friendly
welcome.
    "Good morning Son." His dad said.
    Then he received a lick on the hand from Fetch and a friendly,
moo, from Abby二1he sun was just peeking over the horizon. Kyle just
knew this was going to be a great day!
    After the milking was through, they turned the cows out into
the pasture for the day and separated the morning milking. They both
washed their hands when they were through and ready for breakfast.
Kyle's mom had breakfast ready and sitting on the table. She had fried
some of the eggs Kyle had gathered from the hen house the evening
before. 1hat was one of his daily chores. It was hard carrying the eggs
with his crutches so Fetch always helped him. Fetch would gently carry
the egg basket in his mouth. Kyle's dad said Grace and then it was time
to eat. During breakfast Kyle wanted to ask just one more time for a
pony but knew better. His dad said.
    "Kyle, you better eat a hearty breakfast because today you and 1
have to clean the stalls in the barn and haul what we clean out to the
fields and spread it with the manure spreader."
    A丘er breakfast, Kyle hobbled out to 出e barn with his crutches and
watched as his dad put 出e harness on 出e team ofhorses. When he had
Smokey and Sandy harnessed, he picked Kyle up and placed him on
Smokey's back. Kyle hung onto the harness hames as his dad led the
horses out of the barn and over to hitch them to 出e man ure sp reader.
After the team was hitched to 出e manure spreader, Kyle's dad took
him off of Smokey's back and sat him on the seat of the spreader. 1hen
off toward the barn they went to clean out the stalls.
    Kyle and his dad were in the barn cleaning out the stalls when
Elsie's dad, Mr. Tucker came in the barn door. Kyle saw him first and
said.
    "Hi Mr. T ucker, Dad and 1 are cleaning out the stalls."
    Mr. Tucker gave Kyle a huge smile as he picked him up and gave
him a hug. After he sat Kyle down, Kyle's dad shook Mr. Tucker's hand
and asked him.
    "What brings you over here this time of morning?"
    Mr. Tucker asked Jim, Kyle's dad, if they could talk outside. A丘er
they were outside Mr. Tucker said.
    "Jim, 1 came over to see if you would do something for me. 1
wanted to keep Molly, Elsie's little pony but she is going blind. 1he
Veterinarian told me she will not get any better and needs to be put
down. He offered to put her to sleep but 1 am so short of money; 1 told
him 1 would do it myself. 1 tried to put her down yesterday but 1 just
couldn't do it. 1 came over this morning to see if you would put her
down for me."
    Kyle had been standing inside the barn listening to his dad and Mr.
Tucker talk. When he heard what they were talking about, he hobbled
as fast as he could out of the barn as he yelled.
    "Let me have Molly. 1 will take good care ofher. She can give me a
ride to school even if she can元see. 1 will show her where to go and tal<e
good care of her until Elsie gets well. Please."
    Both men were startled and had hoped Kyle would not hear their
conversation. Finally Mr. Tucker said.
    "Jim, 1 don't know. 1 would feel horrible if Kyle got hurt riding a
pony who is going blind. 1 would give Molly to Kyle if you thought it
could possible work out."
    Kyle's dad thought a moment then replied.
    "Let me talk to Mrs. Wyatt tonight about this. It just may not hurt
a thing to give Kyle's suggestion a try. 1 will be over in the morning and
give you an answer.
    Mr. Tucker gave Kyle a pat on top ofhis head as he said.
    "Kyle, 1 hate that Molly is going blind. She is such a young and
gentle pony. If your parents decide you can have her, you be very careful
when you ride her, with her losing her sight she will tend to stumble."
    Mr. Tucker shook Kyle's dad hand as he said.
    "Jim, 1 will see you in the morning. 1 won't keep you from your
task of cleaning out the stall. 1 know Kyle just can't wait to get back in
the barn and get his hands on a pitch fork."
    He winked and grinned as he was talking. Fetch had been sitting
by Kyle wagging his tail and listening as if he understood everything
being said. When Mr. Tucker turned to leave, Fetch went over by him
to get his usual pat on his head good-by. He liked Mr. Tucker, ever
since he had met him when Kyle had gone to visit Elsie 出e first time
and she let Kyle ride on Molly. Fetch and Molly had become good
friends during this time also.
    Kyle tried to sit on the porch swing with his parents after they
had eaten supper and all the chores were done. He sat on the porch
swing with them but just could not stay awark. The work he had done
with his dad all day just helped make the sandman come early. He
had wanted to stay awake to listen to his parents discuss Molly. After
Kyle had fallen to sleep his dad carried him into the house and tucked
him into bed. He returned to the swing on the porch and started the
evening ritual of listening to the sounds of the evening with his wife
tucked safely in his arm.
    After they had settled in for the evening on the swing, he told
her of his conversation with Mr. Tucker. She had already heard the
whole story from Kyle and had been in deep thought arguing with
her self over what to do while Jim had carried Kyle to bed. Fetch was
dozing next to the swing but stilllistening for anything unusual going
on in the darkness. Kyle's mom felt sorry for Molly and in the back of
her mind she thought if Molly still has some eye sight left maybe she
needed a chance at life. Her husband argued that Kyle could be injured
riding a pony losing its eyesight. He also realized all the feed the pony
would eat he could feed a milk cow and sell its milk. He kept thinking
about the time it would cost him carrying Kyle to and from school
when he needed to be working in the field. 1hey both quietly discussed
their feelings late into the night.τhey decided to get a good night's
sleep and make their decision in the morning.
    Kyle awoke the next morning before the rooster had crowed to
welcome the new day. As he was slipping into his overalls, he heard his
parents talking about Molly and then his dad going out of the door
with the milk pails clanging together as he carried them. He hurriedly
put on his shirt along with his socks and shoes. He didn't even tie his
shoes before he headed for the kitchen. His mom was starting breakfast.
When he stepped into the kitchen, he was met with her gentle smile
as she told him.
    "Your dad has already gone to the barn to milk the cows. You
better run along and help him."
    Kyle started to ask her about Mollie but instead put on his hat and
out the door he hobbled with his crutches to help his dad.
    As Kyle hobbled into the barn, he was met with a friendly.
    "Good morning son; you better grab your milk pail and get Abby
milked. After breakfast we need to go see if Mr. Tucker will still1et you
have Molly or ifhe has changed his mind."
    Kyle could not believe what he had just heard. He stammered.
    "Do 1 really get to have Molly?"
    Kyle's dad replied.
    "Your mother and 1 decided to see if it would work out okay. Your
mom thinks Molly needs a chance as long as she still isn't completely
blind. You will be completely responsible for Mollie's care."
    Kyle picked up his milk pail and as he milked Abby, he kept up a
continuous chatter with her about Molly.
    After the milking was completed and the cows turned out into the
pasture for the day, Kyle turned the handle on the milk separator for
his dad and then helped him fÌnish the morning chores before going in
the house to eat breakfast. As they did the chores, Kyle became overly
anxious to get the morning chores done so they could go get Molly. His
dad cautioned him to feed all the animals as they should be fed and
don't waste grain because he is in a rush. He said.
    "Kyle, always remember to treat your animals with kindness; feed
and water them properly. You know we depend on them to put food on
our table and they must depend 011 us to feed and treat them right."
    After all chickens, ducks, pigs, cows, and horses had been fed
and watered, Kyle and his dad went into the house for a hot waiting
breakfast. As they sat at the breakfast table, Kyle's parent's told him
they were willing to take a chance and let him have Molly. He must be
very careful when he rode her and the care would be up to him. They
could not afford a saddle so he would have to ride Molly bareback.
Kyle promised to take very, very very good care of Molly and he didn't
care if he had a saddle for her, just as long as he had a pony to ride to
school and to take care oE Kyle's parents again cautioned him they were
willing to give Molly a chance but if it didn't work out or proved to be
too dangerous, then she would have to go to pony heaven.
    After breakfast was fÌnished, Kyle gave his mother a kiss and
thanked her for giving Molly a chance and for letting him have her.
Kyle's dad hugged his wife as he said.
    "Mrs. Wyatt, you sure feed your family good. Kyle and 1 are going
to ride Smokey over to see the T uckers. If Mr. T ucker still agrees to give
Kyle MOllY' Kyle can ride her home."
    Kyle already had hobbled out the kitchen door with his crutches
and was anxiously waiting at the front yard gate with Fetch. Kyle's dad
yelled to Kyle from the front porch.
    "Your mother has some table scraps for Fetch; you know he needs
to eat also. Why don't you feed him while 1 go out to the barn and put
the bridle on Smokey so we can ride him over to the Tuckers?"
    By the time Kyle's dad was leading Smokey out of the barn, Kyle
had fed Fetch the table scraps and Fetch has already wolfed them down.
Fetch then looked around to see if another dog had eaten his food since
it had disappeared so fast from his dog dish. Kyle watched as his dad
swung upon Smokey's back and rode to where he was standing. One
of his dad's strong arms reached down and swept Kyle up into the air
and deposited him on Smokey's back behind him. As Smokey plodded
out of the driveway and turned up the dusty country road toward the
Tuckers with an excited young lad, Fetch ran along side of them.
    When Smokey turned into the Tucker's driveway, Mr. Tucker
was just coming out of the barn. Kyle heard a little voice say, hi Mr.
Wyatt.
   

   

CHURCH CAN HURT

    I'll never forget the first time church broke my heart.

    After Luke's graduation from Bible college, we were serving
as volunteer staff in our home church as we sought God's will for
our continued ministry. High on zeal but low on experience, we
never saw it coming when the pastor we were serving under began
feeling threatened by the affection of the congregation toward
Luke. They had been present at his birth, prayed through his
years of rebellion, and were overjoyed at the fact their prodigal
had returned home as a minister no less!

    Take care to note this Scripture doesn't say you should go to a sister
if you are angry with her (though you should), but rather if you see she
has something against you. In my experience, it is a very rare thing
for someone to approach another and say, "There is something
that is bothering me, and I'd like to talk." Our lives would be cake
were it always that easy! Instead, what you will typically experience
are cold shoulders, missed services, and dropped ministries.
For whatever reason, mad members feel the best way to punish
the preacher is to stop showing up and to simply wallow in the
perceived transgression. I call these the "Silent Stewers," and to
deal with them, your spiritual example will require you to suck it
up and in humility make the first move even if you do not believe
you've done anything wrong.

    Sometimes we believe our husbands are the ones people tend to
be upset with, but I have news for you. For reasons that are vastly
different from those your man will face, you can inadvertently step
on the toes of your church women and offend them as easily as their
male counterparts. I've been criticized for anything from forgetting
to pass a prayer-chain request to neglectfully allowing my kids to run
through the church. However, some hurts aren't to be taken lightly.
The number one reason laypeople tell me they harbor bitterness
toward their pastor's wife is because she broke confidence by sharing
private matters with unintended ears. Yes, girls. Our big mouths can
get us in some major trouble. Can we just establish now that we
should keep them shut?
   
    The Pharisees and Sadducees could have cared less about Jesus' teaching had it not directly threatened their influence over the people. Just as in those days, when powerful people begin losing their grip, they will automatically start looking for someone to crucify. Your hubby just happens to be the one most likely to end up as the target.

    This may not encourage you one little bit, but let me tell you
why it should. When we learn to separate people from their actions,
it becomes much easier to love them in spite of how they hurt us.
Now I'm not saying it ever gets easy to watch someone attack Luke
or second-guess him when I know how he agonizes over decisions
where the body is concerned. However, it helps immensely to recognize
that Satan is the ultimate Stink Stirrer and accuser of the
brethren. Remembering this, I can aim my righteous indignation
toward him instead of allowing my unrighteous anger to be directed
toward a brother or sister in Christ. If their criticisms are unfounded,
then ultimately we can rely on God's justice in the matter.

    However, there is an alternative consideration. What if your
accusers have cause? What if you've just flat out blown it? It is a rare
thing for me to hear a story of strife in the body and for a ministry
wife to tell me, "We messed up." Most often we take on the countenance
of a martyr and insist everyone is to blame except us, which
leads to the next step in considering conflict.
   
    I've read many commentaries on this particular passage, and
most agree the angels of the churches refer to the overseers or, presently,
the pastors and elders of the church.
   
    Here's my personal interpretation (please forgive me, theologians,
if this is a stretch): If Jesus Christ Himself is holding my dear husband
in His righteous right hand, then I can trust Him to guide and protect
him in the midst of any adversity. There have been times when people
have cut Luke to the quick, and the only thing that prevented me
from pinning them to the wall was the fact that Jesus already had it
covered. And because we are told in Scripture that marriage is two
people becoming one flesh, I believe that providential care also extends
to you, dear sister, when your heart is broken and bruised. Resting in
His hands and trusting Him to execute perfect justice on behalf of the
innocent are what will keep our hearts and minds from responding
with depression, despondency, and bitterness. If we suffer, it is imperative
that we do so according to 1 Peter 3:16- 17, which says to keep cca
clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good
behavior in Christ may be ashamed of their slander. It is better, if it is
God's will, to suffer for doing good than for doing evil."

    Our God will never let injustice reign. It may take some time,
but I can tell you one thing because I've seen it happen personally:
If we maintain our personal integrity and don't allow the flesh to
control our actions, God Himself will convict hearts, and they will
change for the better. You may never be made aware of this in your
lifetime, but in the words of Dorothy Patterson, ccWe must forgive
when no forgiveness is requested."4 Our calling is to make sure the
conviction doesn't fall on us. And it won't if we beg the Holy Spirit
to aid us in keeping a clear conscience.
   

MY HUSBAND'S CALLING IS MY CALLING TOO

           Many are the plans in a man's heart,
           but it is the LoRD's purpose that prevails.
                                         -Proverbs 19:21

    I once had an interesting conversation with a woman whose husband
had enrolled in seminary to prepare for ministry. "He can take
classes all he wants, but I didn't sign up for the preacher's wife thing,"
she said. Since she didn't believe her husband would actually follow
through, she went on to tell me she planned on humoring him until
the day his calling affected her. And if that day ever came? Well, sh e'd
just cross that bridge when she came to it.
    He is still in school. She is still in denial.
    Around that same time I attended a pastors' wives conference
that included a panel discussion at the end. Lined across the stage,
five women in different seasons of ministry shared the thing they
found most difficult about being married to a minister.
    I'll never forget the response of the youngest woman. She was a
mom of toddlers and was obviously distressed. "The hardest thing for
me is everyone wanting a piece of my husband and not acknowledging
me in the least," she said. "I feel like the person in the background
who is only here to take care of the kids so he can be free to take care
of everyone else."
    I was grieved by her raw response. All I wanted to do was wrap
my arms around that girl and assure her she had it all wrong. That
she was an integral part of her husband's ministry. That her calling
in that season was her children. That no amount of public success
possibly mattered if her heart and home were in shambles. The sad
thing is that I've met many more like her in the past fifteen years
during my own life as a minister's wife. If anything, this has intensified
my desire to embrace and encourage women whom God has charged with supporting
 the men He has ordained to proclaim His Word.
    The fact that I just typed that last sentence still baffies me. You
have no idea how surreal it is for me to be writing this book. There
are many of you reading who have been Christians as long as you
can remember and always knew you would marry a preacher. Many
more of you grew up as the child of a minister and swore you would
never marry one yourself, only to find yourself eating your words.
Some of you have pursued callings to various vocational ministries
and met your mate in college, seminary, etc. Some of you married
men who were already serving in the church. However, based on my
blog surveys, a lot of your serene lives were turned inside out when
your husband experienced God's call to ministry some point after
you were married.
    And then on the lunatic fringe are girls like me whose life and
marital background weren't exactly resume worthy.

friends with benefits

    "Friends with benefits" is a term that has developed over the past decade.
What does this mean? Having a physical relationship with somebody who
you are not committed to or who is not committed to you. He may be a
friend or somebody you once dated. Usually the scenario goes like this.

Girl likes boy.
Boy doesn't want to date or commit to girl (may have different reasons).
Boy wants physical relationship.
Girl thinks she can get boy to like her if she gives boy what he wants
Benefits occur (kissing, making out, sex).
Girl feels bad about self because boy still doesn't want to date her.

You may be asking yourself about now, why would anybody do this?
It's back to the fact that young won1en are not seeing themselves as being
precious but want so desperately to find somebody who will help them
feel special. .. no matter the cost. If you are one of these girls, you are not
treating yourself with the respect that Christ wants for you. He wants
you to feel special. He desires for you to see yourself as a limited edition,
rare, hard to find, a precious jewel. There is a high price that has been
paid for you. Why does some boy get to throw you away and lower your
self-worth?

Read I Corinthians 6:20
For you were bought at a price; therefore glorify God in
your body and in your spirit, which are Gods.

Thought of the day:
How are you glorifying God in your Body?

A Good Day For A Hanging

    As summer waned, and the WNAX weatherman Whitey Larson

forecast a respite from the energy-sapping heat and humidity,

Ma tackled wallpapering.

    In anticipation of the day, she had wallpaper on hand,

having chosen it after poring over sample books at Walton's

Furniture store. The first step involved us kids, enlisted to

remove the old paper. We'd start at the top, where winter's

dry heat had loosened the paper, and slowly pull, trying to

take a strip all the way to the floorboard without a tear. In

the dining room, the walls had wainscoting half way up, so

the vertical strips were shorter than usual. Ma worked at

the stuck paper, wetting the dried paste and scraping with a

putty knife.

    The next morning at the crack of dawn, it seemed, we awoke

to the sound of voices downstairs. Ma had assembled her crew:

her sister Goldie and my sister Lorey. They marched into action,

moving furniture, setting up stepladders, chairs, and sawhorses

with planks laid across them.

    Madonna Dries Christensen has won awards and accolades for

her writing. Her first published fiction garnered a nomination

for the Pushcart Prize. As a novice, she didn't know what that

was and had to look it up. Two other nominations followed, one

for fiction, one for nonfiction.

 

LOVE STORIES, HORROR STORIES

    The answer: no, it is not. "When you wear beautiful but uncomfortable
shoes, your feet hurl. Cinderella's feet didn't hurt because her
shoes-albeit glass-fit her properly. And who knows? Maybe those
glass slippers had a contoured foot bed.
    ANew York City mother of two young daughters, Janet, told me how
excited she was when she received a gift of Jimmy Choo heels-her first
pair ofluxury shoes. She had befriended a woman at her children's preschool,
Julie, and the two of them joked about Manolos and Jimmy
Choos. Janet didn't realize it, but her new friend was not just joking
around. She was very affluent and actually owned many pairs of shoes
from these designers. The day before Janet's birthday,Julie had her personal
shopper from a trendy boutique called Scoop deliver a pair of
Jimmy Choos to Janet's apartment.
    "So I open the box," Janet tells me. "Inside were these incredible
shoes. This woman had bought me gold Jimmy Choo heels! I didn't think
I could accept such an extravagant gift. I tried to give them back to her but
she just said, 1En joy them; just think of me when you're enjoying them.'"
   "But here's the thing," Janet continues, getting serious. "The pair
she had bought me weren't my size. They were a 7 and I'm a 7 .5. So I
went to the store and explained that I needed a size larger. But they didn
' t have any left in any size. But then I saw that the store had another
pair that I loved even more but only in a size 6. So I exchanged my pair
for that pair. I have to shove my feet in them. I love them. They are the
sexiest things. They are very strappy.
    JANET KNOWS not to wear her heels except on rare occasions, and
Carol learned the hard way not to even bother with her new pumps.
Some women, however, are determined to wear their fashionable
shoes no matter what the cost. A forty-four-year-old woman who lives
on Manhattan's Upper West Side, Olivia, works in the fashion industry.
The names inside her shoes are Chanel, Manolo, Prada. "I don't
wear heels every day," she says, because they slow her down. Also, one of
Olivia's heels tends to hurt because of a bone spur (a not-uncommon
phenomenon in which there is extra bone growth on the heel, caused by
aging and! or poorly fitting shoes, discussed in the next chapter).
    "[A] woman's choice to mold her body does not make her a victim.
If bigger boobs are what she wants, it's her right to choose both as a
feminist and as an individual .... We BUST girls are not immune to
feeling insecure about our bodies, but we're smart enough to know that
we don't need to be victimized by it."
    Concurred Debbie Stoller, Bust's other coeditor:
    "Unlike our feminist foremothers, who claimed that makeup was
the opiate of the misses, we're positively prochoice when it comes to
matters of feminine display. We're well aware, thank you very much, of
the beauty myth that's working to keep women obscene and not heard,
but we just don't think that transvestites should have all the fun .... We
love our lipstick, have a passion for polish, and, basically, adore this
armor that we call'fashion.' To u s, it's feminine, and, in the particularwaywe
flaunt it, it's definiteJy feminist."
    This new feminist credo of the 1990s was that women have the
power to exercise personal power and therefore to ~~choose" to bare
their bra straps and to get an eye lift if that is what they want to do. This
(~girl culture" was supposed to be a form of feminine strength and
power. It's okay to flaunt your femininity, young women were told, as
long as they were culturally hip, ironic, and knowing enough to recognize
that they were referencing RuPaul and not Donna Reed.
    We like to imagine that if we wear fashionable shoes, others will perceive
us as strong, sexy, and in control. But when a woman is a slave to
fashion, it is quite likely that others regard her as a victim of her own
making. Is that really worth the price of a case of Band-Aids and corn
pads?
   

In His Shoes

    "No red," he said quietly.

   

     Kris put down the paper and looked up. "what did you say? Sorry ,I
couldn't hear you ."

     No response.

     Nick kept trying to look at the positive of what was on the plate in 

front of him.Hmmm. The foods are not touching ...good,RED apples,yuck! It's

not that he didn't like the taste of apples. Applesauce and apple pie were

delicious.But to put such an offensive color on his plate with other foods 

could not be tolerated.Crinking his nose.he wondered, Why would Kris serve

me red food? It is infecting my whole plate.Gross.In a gruff voice,he groaned

louder,"No!"

    He looked up at Kris. He liked Kris . He knew that she was trying to 

be nice tjo him as she reminded him, "Nick, it's time to eat." Her voice

was calm and cheerful,which he had learned to associate with the emotion

of happiness.

     How could she not know that red,sliced apples were visually the most

offensive food on the planet? I wish mom was here. She would say, "Kris,

peel off the red skin and cut the apple into small chunks. Problem solved!"

Or,How about green apples?

     Well somehow he was going to have to let Kris in on his "secret of

lift." Seconds passed as he stared at the awful sight in front of him,

trying to figure out how to tell Kris about this problem.

     The challenge facing Nick was that he had autism and

 was practically nonverbal. He rarely spoke, and when he did 

speak, usually his words were not understood or particularly 

relevant to those around him, Sometimes he just echoed what 

other people said.